I'm a college football player whose team is going for the national championship....

What should I wear uniform wise….oh I dunno….

T he Oregon Ducks. All they have to do to disorient the Auburn Tigers is just show up and

SOCK EM!!!

Quote...

"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.”

-- Douglas Adams.

FW: Cat and Mice In Heaven

Cat and Mice In Heaven





A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.'


The cat thought for a minute and then said, 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'

God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat

The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again.'
God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?'

The cat replied, 'Oh, it is WONDERFUL. I have never been so happy in my life. The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!'





Hey we need a cute clean one every once in awhile.

msnbc.com video: 'Tron Legacy' visual effects teaser

'Tron Legacy' visual effects teaser

Visual effects concept teaser for "Tron Legacy." Film opens December 17th.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/35676190#35676190

The Cowboy and his wife and a sheep...

Cowboy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says, "Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The wife, laying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep, not a cow."
The cowboy replies, "If you weren't such a bi**h, you'd realize I was talking to the sheep."