not for the squeamish...but, still kinda funny...

A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert
when he saw something far off in the distance, only to find a wizened old Jewish man at
a small stand selling ties. The Taliban demanded, "Do you have water?" The old man
replied, "I have no water, but would you like to buy a tie? They’re only $5."
The Taliban shouted, "Bastard Jew! All you want to do is make money! I do not
need an overpriced tie. I need water! Filthy Jew, I should kill you, but I must find water
first."
“OK," said the old Jew, "it doesn’t matter tif you don’t want to buy a tie and that
you hate me, I’ll show you that I am bigger than you. Continue over that hill to the east
for about a mile, and you’ll find a lovely restaurant with all the water and food you
need. Shalom."
Muttering, the Taliban staggered away over the hill but several hours later he
staggered back.
"Your brother won't let me in without a tie."