For you teachers or parents - Kids in school think quick....

TEACHER:  Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA:  Here it is!
TEACHER:  Correct.  Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS:  Maria!
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TEACHER:  Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK:  Because of the sign.
TEACHER:  What sign?
FRANK:  The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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TEACHER:  John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:  You told me to do it without using tables!
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TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN:  K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong
GLENN:  Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
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TEACHER:  Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:  H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER:  What are you talking about?
DONALD:  Yesterday you said it's H to O!
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TEACHER:  Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE:  Me!
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TEACHER:  Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS:  Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER:  Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE:  I is...
TEACHER:  No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE:  All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
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TEACHER:  Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO:  Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
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TEACHER:  George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish  him?"

LOUIS:  Because George still had the ax in his hand.
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TEACHER:  Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:  No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER:  Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's.  Did you copy his?
CLYDE:  No, teacher, it's the same dog!
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TEACHER:  Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD:  A teacher.